I stopped running from my past long enough to catch my breath.
The view doesn’t change much when you’re running in circles, but the shift in elevation reveals progress.
When you can’t see it, the thinner air is a signal of a fresh vantage point.
The journey is my own, it’s your own, it’s no one else’s.
It’s sacred and singular, while also encapsulating the journey of each soul who has walked this earth.
I look back on the past, parts of it seem eons away, while other aspects are fresh in my mind.
Vacuum sealed if you will.
I’ve ran for so long, I forgot what it’s like to walk.
Pain that I pushed away, bubbled up when I had the space to heal it.
Pain that I tried to push through, lingered until I could hold it and sit with it.
This journey that I’ve been on is all my own, and you’d never know by just looking at me.
(Why is it we fail to see someone’s humanity until we see their struggle?)
Why is it easier to resonate with someone’s pain than their joy?
Have we not all loved deeply?
Have we not all lost?
Have we not all returned home to ourselves after searching everywhere else?
The weight of the past no longer holds me.
My mind is a grassy field, a hillside by a mountaintop. Where the air is crisp and the sunlight filters down in angelic rays, the crystalline light so pure it’s like you can reach out and be immediately illuminated in its warmth.
Yes it rains, and sometimes the storm seems insufferable. But it always clears. And the fresh smell that comes with the cleansing makes every rain drop worth it.
In my mid-twenties, you can find a million versions of me, depending on what glasses you put on.
And I might recreate myself a hundred, a thousand more times.
But the heart of me, my soul, only gets stronger with each day that passes.
I will never have all the answers, and I don’t want them.
I just want to live a beautiful life and bask in love with my community.
Today I am alive, but this human body won’t last forever.
At times my soul aches for a home that seems to be universes away, but I can bring myself back to this moment, back into my body, and feel like this is exactly where I’m meant to be.
We are all here learning our own lessons.
Perhaps we’re all learning the same lesson.
Perhaps not.
Regardless, we’re learning.
Be kind.
